Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Randomize
