you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize