my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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