break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
