Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point