I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
