Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
