Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(954): View more from Florida

I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.

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(954): I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay. http://tfl.nu/qnk1

Replies (32) Good night (1511) Bad night (5371)
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(864): View more from South Carolina

I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction

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(864): I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction http://tfl.nu/jk7c

Replies (71) Good night (5468) Bad night (926)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour

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(978): u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour http://tfl.nu/oz5v

Replies (10) Good night (1376) Bad night (3248)
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(406): View more from Montana

What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?

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(406): What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name? http://tfl.nu/6xxw

Replies (10) Good night (4512) Bad night (960)
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(914): View more from New York

Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.

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(914): Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive. http://tfl.nu/oqgn

Replies (18) Good night (2119) Bad night (2285)
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(905): View more from Ontario

He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night

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(905): He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night http://tfl.nu/aleg

Replies (11) Good night (2668) Bad night (901)
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(949): View more from California

Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?

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(949): Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday? http://tfl.nu/2an5

Replies (7) Good night (1208) Bad night (703)
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(201): View more from New Jersey

surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser

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(201): surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser http://tfl.nu/4p89

Replies (5) Good night (433) Bad night (974)
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(910): View more from North Carolina

No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.

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(910): No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess. http://tfl.nu/luxa

Replies (6) Good night (1651) Bad night (518)
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(443): View more from Maryland

i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream

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(443): i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream http://tfl.nu/zdot

Replies (9) Good night (483) Bad night (1346)
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(518): View more from New York

We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours

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(518): We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours http://tfl.nu/zbw4

Replies (9) Good night (945) Bad night (338)
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(425): View more from Washington

Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf

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(425): Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf http://tfl.nu/epw3

Replies (4) Good night (328) Bad night (305)
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(248): View more from Michigan

The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks

(248): View more from Michigan

Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down

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(248): The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks (248): Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down http://tfl.nu/3xjk

Replies (2) Good night (789) Bad night (273)
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(815): View more from Illinois

OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!

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(815): OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST! http://tfl.nu/0ytf

Replies (6) Good night (227) Bad night (795)
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(630): View more from Illinois

and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby

(1-630): View more from Illinois

Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?

(630): View more from Illinois

only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.

(1-630): View more from Illinois

Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here

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(630): and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby (1-630): Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted? (630): only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby. (1-630): Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here http://tfl.nu/fcdg

Replies (2) Good night (290) Bad night (320)

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