I'm drive I can fine osifer
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
We don't watch enough power rangers
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Randomize
