He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
