She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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