I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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