Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
