your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
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