I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize