i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize