hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
