piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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