you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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