everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
