she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
I FOUND THE LEGS
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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