adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
