I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
