He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Randomize
