Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Randomize
