lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
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