Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
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