can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
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