Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
