I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
