Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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