found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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