Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
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Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
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