well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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