hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize