Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
