I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
