sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Randomize
