those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
