it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
ok first of all what the fuck
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize
