And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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