well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
