Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
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