she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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