No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
