im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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