I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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