I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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