It's like God shit irony all over that family
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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