ADVERTISEMENT

• (614): View more from Ohio

  So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?

  (1-614): View more from Ohio

  ...yea

  (614): View more from Ohio

  She's valid.

  Fav 3 3610 773

  share tweet
  

• (916): View more from California

  He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics

  Fav 29 3369 3960

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (925): View more from California

  you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.

  Fav 18 863 3149

  share tweet
  

• (203): View more from Connecticut

  walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!

  Fav 33 1085 5792

  share tweet
  
• 

  23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (720): View more from Colorado

  You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.

  Fav 94 8336 2001

  share tweet
  

• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.

  Fav 25 5395 2634

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (919): View more from North Carolina

  They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible

  Fav 7 4244 1366

  share tweet
  

• (317): View more from Indiana

  What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?

  Fav 20 1648 3725

  share tweet
  

• (323): View more from California

  You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.

  Fav 2 1596 858

  share tweet
  
• 

  These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (319): View more from Iowa

  I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.

  Fav 4 1894 913

  share tweet
  

• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.

  Fav 6 1790 765

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (203): View more from Connecticut

  Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.

  Fav 8 2565 885

  share tweet
  

• (850): View more from Florida

  Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.

  Fav 2 1555 737

  share tweet
  

• (330): View more from Ohio

  We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.

  Fav 3 853 538

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.

  Fav 0 353 482

  share tweet
  

Randomize